=\

After today, either thermodynamics is gone (ie. I don't have to retake it) or my honours is a goner, considering that thermodynamics is a prerequisite to a year 3 module, and that year 3 module may be a prerequisite to my year 4 modules = 5 years in uni. =/

The Fright Of My Life (ie. For This Year)

Today, I had the fright my my life for this year. Well, I wouldn't term this as the ultimate fright of my life, because it isn't as huge as one waking up and discovering that one has lost both legs because one's terrapins have been chewing on them while one was asleep, and I'd had bigger frights than this one (ie. the fright of my life this year, not the freaky predator terrapins incident). That being said, do also note that the above example is an analogy, rather than a real-life experience of the ultimate fright of one's life because... well, I still have my legs. It all begain on a friday night (ie. just yesterday)...

[Glass Cookie (GC) receives an sms from his music director (MD) asking him to help play for the baptism service on saturday at around 3:59 p.m., but the message was only read close to 6:45 or 7:00 p.m.]

[Well, on a side note, should anyone ever send me an sms, please do not sit and wait beside your phone for an answer, because... well... my phone is usually on the silent mode and I don't really check my phone very often. If you ever recall an incident in which I replied within minutes to prove the above statement, trust me: You were somewhat lucky because my phone happened to vibrate and light up and I happened to be beside it at the right place, and at the right moment, and at the right eye level, and at the right sound level, and the right time and the right frame of mind (ie. to detect the vibrations and not let my subconscious respond to it)and at the... etc etc etc. Yup, you get the idea. So, you have a better chance calling my house phone or something should I be home =) ]

GC's thought: Hmmm, I think I'd better call him considering that this is not a small matter.

[GC searches for his MD's number and made a call to him]

GC (noticing that the line was through) : Erm...

[Well, GC was in his right frame of mind enough not to make a call and simply say "Erm..." and pause there. More accurately, before he could make his greeting or say "Hi", GC's MD said something]

MD: Oh [GC's name]...

GC's thought (interrupting at a split second): Hey, he's one of the rare few to greet me that fast. Oh no, what if it was so urgent such that he's actually been waiting for me? Nah, he sounded more friendly than worried.

MD: So, could you play for the baptism service tomorrow?

GC (thinking for a brief moment): Hmmm, yup. I could/should/would be able to make it.

MD: Oh, so could I meet you at 1:45 p.m. at the lobby at level 1 tomorrow?

GC: OK.

GC's thought: Hmmm, he's asking me to play... Considering that the baptism service usually has only a pianist or a guitarist to play... Nah, that's not possible. I mean, I'm not even auditioned yet. Hey, the baptism service has upgraded to a full worship team? That's cool!

GC: Oh, so would it be string scores or chord charts (well, for those not serving in the music ministry, FYI, string scores or chord charts are usually what I get, serving as the 2nd keyboardist in church. String scores consists of tau geis whereas chord charts, as the name suggests, consists of chord letters. The pianist (aka the 1st keyboardist) usually get chord charts)?

GC's thoughts: Well, I hope it's a chord chart, considering that I'm Phaseolusaureusphobic (ie. my sight reading is really bad) and I'm better off playing something by ear, and a chord chart gives me all the excuse to do so.

MD: There will be 3 songs - a string score and two chord charts. Don't worry, it's quite simply so you'll be able to sight read it.

GC's thoughts: Oh, no... I think he has thoroughly overestimated my sight reading skills.

GC: OK. See you tomorrow then!

GC's thoughts: Hmmm, I wonder who the pianist would be. Guess it's either BF or M (ie. names of two probable pianists in church. I wouldn't want anyone to find this blog by just googling their name). I was right... the baptism service has upgraded after all.

[And so, GC's muggings continue for the night and then, comes the next day in the sanctuary close to around 1:50 p.m. at the backstage. PCh (ie. the pastor whose name starts with a 'c', followed by a 'h'. 'Ch' was used considering that there are 3 pastors in LE whose names happened to start with a 'c'. But do note that he has no relation to PCK despite the similarity of their names, the fact that both of them are singaporeans and that both of them are males. If you're thinking that what I'm doing here is unnecessary, maybe you would like to simply google for PCl like this: "pastor cl..." blogspot with the quotation marks to indicate an exact term search {erm, I'm not risking anything here. cl... is to be replaced by his name totally spelt out} and you'll actually find a lighter's blog on page 2 of the results. See... you get what I mean?} =) Oops, I think I've strayed from the main topic again. Anyway, back to the story...), MD and GC was at the scene]

PCh (smiling): So, are you ready?

GC's thoughts: Huh? Am I ready? It's not that difficult playing the string parts for the keyboard, really, provided that I do know the songs. Come to think about it, I don't really know what songs other than "Jesus, Lover of My Soul" is being sung.

[GC smiles back, indicating he's ok, or should be ok, without saying a word]

MD (getting GC's attention to brief him on the order of the service): So, these are the songs to be played, and these are the scores. You play this song first... (continues his briefing).

[Then, the time has come for the worship part to start, and PCh, MD and GC goes to the keyboard. GC takes his seat at the 2nd keyboard but MD asks him not to play on the second keyboard]

GC (sensing that something has gone wrong, and apparently lost): Erm, I thought there's a pianist right? Who's the pianist anyway?

GC's thought: And if I'm not playing on the 2nd keyboard, where am I supposed to play anyway? But I guess I'll ask him after the first question is answered.

MD (with the look that conveys: "Don't be ridiculous"): You're the pianist lah.

GC's thought: WHAT???!!! But I thought... I thought... there's supposed to be another pianist right?

GC's subconscious (you see, once again, it comes up to do stuff, be it necessary or unnecessary, called for or uncalled for. But it so happened that this time, it's uncalled for but necessary): Hey, hey, you don't have time to think already. Get yourself at the electric piano and sort out your playing man.

[GC goes over and takes his seat. He glances at the songs and realised that he has totally no idea how the first song is supposed to be played]

MD: OK, I've already told the sound guys that you'll be trying out on the piano. Can you play this song?

GC's thought: AAARRRGH!!! I can't chord read that well. Oh no, what if my performance now is part of the consideration with regards to the upcoming audition? Oh no, this is terrible, terrible, terrible... and, idislikeperformingidislikeperformingidislikeperforming...

GC's subconscious: Hey, enough of thoughts and start playing. You don't have time for this you know...

[GC starts to play, then breaks down (actually, this term is borrowed from another person. I have no idea what else to call it since it's an unexplainable phenomenon in which I simply pause or stop playing abruptly and I have no idea what it's formal name or definition is. GC wasn't crying.)]

GC's thoughts: Oh no, this is bad. If I were on my own, I could play it without much problems. But with 2 people listening out on my playing... arrrgh, it's stressful... =(

GC's subconscious: Hey, you don't have a choice. Just play by ear.

GC's thoughts: Arrrgh, I have no choice. I'll just have to play by ear. This is bad. I hope [MD's name]'s ok with it.

[The playing is done halfway when GC was asked to switch to another song due to time constraints, and that was also done, up till the first song]

PH (ie. another pastor from LE whose name starts with a 'h'): Later you have to play louder. The congregation might not be able to hear.

[GC nods his head to indicate he got the message]

GC's thoughts: Oh man, it's my touch on the piano again. This is the time I wished I had a harder set of piano keys at home.

GC (to PCh): Erm, I don't know how this song sounds like. Could you sing it?

[PCh sings out the song while MD plays the melody on the piano. At this point of time, GC frantically looks at the chord chart to figure out the chords. And then, not too long after GC plays the song once through, it is time for the service to start. Then, the praise and worship begins]

[Well, the order of things are quite blur at this point of time, but what could be recalled was, at many points in time, the following happened]

GC's thoughts: Oh no, what's the next, next chord (considering that the next chord is already deciphered)? It's a... hmmm... oh wait, it feels like a.... hmmmm... it chooses to remain as a feeling. [to GC's brain, the area where the memory is stored] Hey, what's the next chord?

GC's brain, the memory branch (Well, once again this is just my own theory - the brain contains the following: The subconscious, the thoughts generated from GC's conscious and the memory area and some other segments that I can't think of. Basically they are interrelated, but individual): Nothing here. Apparently, the subconscious branch took it. Can't you feel it?

GC's thoughts: Hey, what's the chord? This chord feels like it's not a basic chord although a basic chord could be used for it. Arrrgh... I have only 4 beats left. Aha, look at the score. Let me see... actually, I have no idea I've progressed to which part on the score now, since I didn't look at it from the start. Sigh, I have no choice. A basic chord shall it be.

GC's subconscious: Hey man, that basic chord sounds flat. It sounds flat and bad you know.

GC's thoughts: Hey, I know. Look who's talking man... and sadly, the chord still remains as a feeling.

[And at some other points, the following happened]

GC's subconscious: Hey, you're playing faster/slower/faster/slower/faster/slower/faster/slower (you see, this time, the subconscious tries to confuse GC by getting him to start evaluating as to whether he played faster or slower than the congregation's/PCh's singing speed rather than fix the speed problem itself)

GC's thoughts: Oh no, there's a timing difference... Am I faster or slower?

GC's subconscious: Hey, you don't really have time to think if you're faster or slower you know...

GC's thoughts: Arrrgh, this is irritating. I shall listen out for PCh and take his speed...

[At the end of the stressful episode, which also meant the end of the praise and worship session, at the backstage area after GC exits the stage]

PCh (jokingly, but knowing that GC was definitely stressed): Wa, you play until you're all perspiring ah? (indicating how stressed GC was)

GC's thoughts: Well, it was a hot day... I think... although I'm in the sanctuary for about half an hour now... hmmm...

GC (still stunned, and shaking): It was stressful.

PCh (smiling): Don't worry. You played [some term that meant complimentary, but I can't exactly recall for now].

GC's thoughts: Thanks for the consolation, but I didn't think I played that well. Hey, how did I get the idea that there was supposed to be another pianist?

And such was the frightful experience of my life of this year. I hope such a frightful experience does not happen again, although... well, I'm can't be too sure about it...

Thought (once again, although it's also GC's thought, it's not part of a recalled event): Playing by surprise can be a nightmare =/

A Rare Crappy Conversation

Well, although it's late at night and I've got my maths paper coming up in 3 (ok, make that 2, considering it's after midnight now) days time, I thought I'd just blog and get more of a life (well, I wouldn't say "get a life", since there isn't one in engineering in general and it's not like blogging is an activity full of 'life' as one would see it) considering that I've been studying for at least 5-7 hours a day, everyday including weekends and I'm getting sick of it.

Anyway, just a couple of days ago, my sis and I actually had a rare conversation. Well, not that conversations were rare between us, but it is rare (as the title suggests) as my anti-crappy sis actually started crapping. And since it's actually so rare, I thought I'd just blog about it. And here was how it went:

[As Glass Cookie (GC)'s sister was lying on her bed, GC noticed something about her head/scalp/whatever-you-call-it]

GC: Hey, I could see a bald patch (ie. on GC's sis' head)

GC's sis: Huh? Where?

GC: Hmmm, pass me your camera phone...

[GC takes hold of GC's sis' phone and tries to snap a picture]

GC (can't really be bothered to check out the settings for himself): Hey, it's pitch dark.

GC's sis: Oh, you need to switch to night mode.

GC's thoughts: Yup, I know that. Hmmm... I should have just changed it myself. What was I thinking about asking her?

[GC snaps the picture and passes his sis the camera phone, and some conversation with regards to the bald patch takes place. Then, it reaches a point where: ]

...
...
...

GC: Hey, I think I know how you got it (ie. the bald patch). Do you still remember? When we were kids, we were running at home and you hit your head against a chair.

GC's sis: Huh? Is it? I can't remember leh...

GC: Well, it's a white chair at our house in Farrer Court, remember?

GC's sis: You see la. If I didn't hit my head I would be in RJ already...

GC (taken aback at the crappy answer): Hey, you're crapping! ... ... Well, I also remember hitting my head against the tap twice when I was small. Daddy even panicked at the sight of the blood...

GC's sis: Oh, then you could have gone to Harvard already (if not for the accidents)...

And surprisingly, the above was not all. Somehow, the crappy conversation went on to what criteria would she use should any guy be interested in her. And this was the list that she gave (note that the bracketed figure states the percentage of guys left after the condition has been in place):

GC's sis' Criteria
- He must not have any leg hair (50%)
- He must not have disgusting skin complexion (50%)
-He must be taller than her (65%)
- Totally disgusting guys are out (ie. having one or more of the following): (80%)
>>> minimal hygiene
>>> play neopets
>>> beer belly
>>> greasy, unkempt hair
>>> guys who finish up their meal and burping loudly, then saying "bao2 bao3"
>>> has a habit of biting his nails
- His salary must be higher than her (80%)
- He must be stronger than her - or she will club him to death (60%)
- He must not be a wimp (85%)
- He mustn't like pink (99%)
- Lame guys are out, because she thinks their jokes are retarded (But do note that this does not apply to my kind of crapping as my sis thinks that at least the kind of crap I post on my blog shows "some kind of intelligence" to her). (95%)

But the thing is, I thought the following criteria would be applicable:
- He must be able to accept physical abuse (50%)
- He must be able to withstand verbal abuse (e.g. from GC's sis: "I hate your Hong Kong accent") (50%)
- He must be able to withstand belittlement (e.g. from GC's sis: "I despise you"), considering that guys do have an ego (25%)
- He must not be introverted (50%)
- He must accept her "cute" size (25%)

And on top of that, general statistics, trends and assumptions have it that:
- Guys make up 50% of the population (50%)
- 50% of the guys are supposedly attached (50%)
- He must be a Christian (14%)
- His education must equal her or better (75%)

Considering that she would be exposed to 3 batches of people around her age group, and that she was born in the dragon year, the number of people for the sample size would be 50,000 (estimated figure for dragon year babies of her birth year) +40,000 x 2 = 130,000.

Thus, multiplying the above figure with all the percentages would leave her with 1.33 guy(s) (well, I'm not sure if 1.33 is indicative of a plural or not, so I thought I'd just play safe and leave it as a bracket 's'). And since it's not possible to be attached to 0.33 of a guy (I shall not elaborate on how a guy could be 0.33 lest it gets way off topic), that leaves her with one guy.

And my sis' conclusion was, that has to be the guy that God has in store for her. =)

Hmmm, I have no idea how to end this post, so I shall simply end now.

Thank You Lord =)

Thanks for all the prayer support, for all who prayed for me. Your prayers have been very well answered. =) Well, right after the day I ranted and sent out a desperation sms seeking prayer support, I actually understood my aerodynamics the very next day. And for that, I have to thank the Lord in working a miracle in my life =)

The Day When Everything Falls Apart

Arrrgh! This is bad bad bad bad bad... It does not help to know that for my exam period of 3 weeks:

1) This coming wednesday will be the start of my first paper. And, it's aerodynamics. Arrrgh!!!

2) After spending days on a single chapter of lecture notes (you read right. It's but a chapter out of 11) on aerodynamics, I still do not understand a single crap. In fact, how does one understand crap (Puns intended. ie. be it the phenomenon of a pathetically low efficiency or the topic of aerodynamics) like that to begin with? Arrrgh!!!

3) Somehow, my music director wants to somewhat audition me again either tomorrow or the next week with regards to something that I shall not elaborate since it's a separate topic altogether. And since auditioning = playing for someone to listen out + scrutinise = performance, and idislikeperformingidislikeperformingidislikeperforming... ARRRGH!!!

4) Pastor Rachel just called to tell me that the wedding couple I'm playing for are trying to look for some classical songs. It's either the wedding march or some other wedding song, or some other non-wedding-song-but-they-want-it-as-their-wedding-song-anyway song (although I'm not too sure which category that song belonged to, seriously, it doesn't matter really matter as you would find out as you read on...) and if they can't find it, I have to play it on the piano. Well, in case anyone have mistaken my usual playing as an indicator of my classical playing skills, maybe this would set the perspective in order: My sight reading is TERRIBLE and is only about 1% (or less) as decent as my normal playing, not that my playing is any decent to being with when it's a performance =/ And oh yup, I'll have to find some bunch of interludes (aka piano solos) that would last for over 22 minutes. ARRRGH!!!

5) Based on my examination schedule, there is no time to practise whatever that's mentioned in point number 4. And as such, ARRRGH!!!!!!!!!! (since I can't increase the caps or bold font from the previous 4 'arrrghs', all I could do is to increase the number of exclamation marks to emphasise on the exasperation I feel)

6) And on top of it all, it doesn't help to know that school will start a few days after my last paper and that my schedule from then on might be about an 8-hour-per-day week from mondays to fridays. =/ ARRRGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, as of now, all I could say is: Arrrgh!!! Arrrrgh!!! ARRRRRRGHHH!!! ARRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (oh, I realised I could increase the number of 'R's and 'H's after all). You might be wondering why I'm spending time here ranting instead of trying to study my aerodynamics when it's just this wednesday. You see, at this stage, it makes no difference to me whether I blog or not. And as such, I'm better off doing something I enjoy as compared to mugging those set of notes since there is no productivity in both activities anyway. OK, perhaps there would be more productivity for mugging aerodynamics, but should it be quantified against blogging, the ratio of blogging:aerodynamics would be around 1:1.0000000000000001. And based on that fact... everything is falling apart!!! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =/

Please pray for me, because I'll be needing all the prayer support available. Thanks a lot.

Conclusion: When it all falls apart, all I could do is to look to God and pray for the best. For the start, I thank the Lord for a wonderful coursemate who will be there for me on monday to help me with my aerodynamics.

My First...

Well, when the whole world talked about some 4-letter representation of their personality a number of years ago, I had totally no idea what they were talking about until a few years ago (OK, maybe it's hard to quantify 'many' and 'few' since 3 could be many to one while 500 could be few to another. Basically, it took me a year before I realised the craze about 4-letter personality descriptions). And ever since those a-few-years-ago which wasn't very far from many-years-ago, whenever I've been asked about my 4-letter combi that describes my personality, I only knew that it contains an 'I' (ie. introverted - for those out there who still do not know about this 4-letter combi thingy). Although I had a vague impression of what those letters like J, F, T, and whatever-else-there-were roughly meant, I wasn't too sure about it. And as such, since my best buddy popped me an online test, I thought I'll try it for fun.

And since I'm quite sure you would be pretty bored if I went on to explain about all the thought processes I had about what I thought about such a test, my other history with people talking about such stuff and all, I shall go straight to the result. OK, technically speaking, I can't go straight to the result because I have seemingly beat around the bush, although it's not like I was violent towards plants or anything (note: It's after midnight now. Crappiness, as you know, increases...). So, more accurately, I shall now go straighter to the point. And the result is (erm, without drum rolls, that is. I can't predict when a person would reach this point and play an mp3 file with a fixed number of seconds of silence followed by a series of drum rolls due to different reading speeds of people):

I'm... INTJ

According to them, I'm:

- very expressed introvert
- moderately expressed intuitive personality
- distinctively expressed thinking personality
- moderately expressed judging personality

Well, they provided 2 links that describe INTJs, but I guess I'll read it some other time (OK, this sound strange. I mean, it does not matter to any reader whether I read it now or later, right? Well, I guess I'm really tired. Yup, I'm feeling crappy and tired. I don't know if anyone knows how these two link together, but, yup, that's what I am feeling now):
http://keirsey.com/personality/ntij.html
http://typelogic.com/intj.html

I guess I'll end for now. Oh, and before I forget, here's another test I did as popped to me by Matthea:
http://friends.imagini.net/vdna.php?uid=185894-35fb&srv=iwebcl5

And now... to lala land... (I wonder if they call it lai lai land in hebrew since their lai lai lai seemed to be an equivalent to our la la la).