Continuation From An Earlier Post

Well, as the above title suggests, this post is a continuation from that liquid paper hunt I carried out. As for the quirky discoveries around the area surrounding my estate, these was what I discovered:

Strange Planning

Well, if you thought this is but a picture of some steps in some HDB area with vegetation surrounding it, look carefully again... they actually cemented a table and its seats such that it blocked half of the area right above the stairway!!! Hmmm, maybe the architect was drunk when he planned it? Or perhaps land in singapore is so scarce that they had to place it at such a location out of desperation? Only the architect knows...

Parallax Error

As for this one... I can't help but take it personally in a way, given my tendency to look at the ground while walking. Hmmm, perhaps it was with the intent of causing people like me to knock one's head against the traffic light in mind, that the road markings were made this way. Or perhaps, given such a tendency (ie. to look down), perhaps it was meant to shock people like me who happened to be pretty alert and happened to notice the discrepancy of the road markings, and that shock could cause a little delay in reaction (with respect to an oncoming vehicle), thus endangering one's life while still on the road.

Arrrgh, either way it is definitely a tricky situation. And having to face and overcome such shocks and life-threatening situations, especially for those who have to cross this path everyday, who exactly was it who said that singapore is a boring place...?

Thought: I wonder what other quirky stuff/dangers might possibly exist around my estate..

=)

Upgraded to a double cookie with the cream in the middle as of today =)

As of yesterday (ie. saturday), I am truly intimidated. Thus, simply-smile-and-say-nothing protocol will be activated, and prolonged indefinitely. =/

Roach Wars

Arrrgh, I just saw a cockroach at the kitchen. And somehow, after securing the housefly swatter, the cockroach is nowhere to be seen. And it was quite good in the art of hiding, I must say, since I couldn't hunt it down (yep, you read right, I hunted for it with a housefly swatter, although I did exercise lots of caution). Hmmm, perhaps it has come to haunt me to take revenge on behalf of its late counterpart(s)? Perhaps it's suicidal? Or perhaps it has come to declare war upon me? Hmmm...

Conclusion: If they want war, I will give them war...

A 45-minute Liquid Paper Hunt And Quirky Discoveries

Just yesterday, I was out of home on a walk to hunt for liquid paper. Somehow, for the past I-can't-exactly-remember-how-many-but-it's-many-enough years, liquid paper would not be found when I needed it the most. And as such, I decided to take a loooong walk (erm, this is also a start in preparation for my IPPT which is coming) out of home just to get it. This was how it roughly started:

Glass Cookie (GC): Do you have liquid paper?

GC's sis: Oh, I brought to the office already.

GC: Huh? OK, I'm going out to get it.

GC's sis (curious, and seemingly knowing something that GC doesn't): Eh kor, where are you going to get it huh?

GC (in a matter-of-factly manner): Anchorpoint la. Evergreen bookshop.

GC's sis (with that looks that portrays, "You've gotta be kidding me"): Huh? That bookshop closed for more than 6 months already leh.

GC (obviously shocked): WHAT???!!!

GC's thoughts: Man, that goes to show how often I've shopped around my area. This is bad bad bad bad bad...

GC's sis: Queensway also don't have. Maybe you want to try alexandra village.

[And not too long later, GC makes his way out of the house]


And so, I did the following trail in my liquid paper hunt:

1) Walked from my home to anchorpoint to find it, but none was found (you see, denial is one particular stage that is quite hard to snap out of, when you're shocked initially. And since it's along the way to where the suggested destination is, why not?).

2) Proceeded next to queensway shopping centre but no stationary shop was found there, sadly (erm, well... since queensway shopping centre is quite near to anchorpoint, and along the way, and the time taken to walk to there from anchorpoint isn't exactly sufficient for one to snap out of denial yet...).

3) Walked from queensway shopping centre to across the road where alexandra village is, with all the HDB shops and all. But the thing was, most of them were closed.

4) Walked around the estate area around alexandra village and got the same results.

5) Walked from there (ie. alexandra village) to dawson place (erm, that's like some 1.25 km based on my estimation) but all the shops that claimed that they sold essential products based on the sign boards they erected on their walls did not sell liquid paper. Hmmm, perhaps light bulbs and well... products from renowned companies like P&G are more essential than liquid paper.

6) Headed back to the minimart just behind my place since I suddenly realised/recalled/whatever-you-call-it its existence. OK, this may sound strange, but I somehow hoped that I wouldn't find it at the minimart just at the back of my home although I've been hunting for it, because... after walking for over 30 minutes all over the place only to find it just beside my home seemed like a joke. And I didn't feel like I wanted to be in that joke. Oh well, the good and bad news is that I didn't find liquid paper there. Come to think about it, even if I found it, it's also good and bad news (ie. I'd achieve my objective and end up looking like I did something silly travelling the whole of my area). Oh well, anyway... off to the next point...

7) Recalling that there is one particular shop around the area behind my estate that sells misc items, I went around that area to hunt for it. And to my delight finally I found my liquid paper there. Erm, actually, the delight was not because I was so yearning to find liquid paper and finally found it. You see, after walking to about 5 to 6 places and not finding anything, I've kind of given up hope in finding it. Rather, it was because I found it a considerable distance from home after all the walking, and that would somehow seem less of a joke as stated in point 6.

Oh well, it's getting late, so I'd better end for now. Well, as for the quirky discoveries, I guess I'll blog about them another day since ending the post now or continuing from here doesn't make much of a difference with regards to those discoveries.

Thought: If anyone's life depended on a bottle of liquid paper in alexandra road, he's/she's probably a goner if he/she didn't have 45 minutes to look for it.

The Moment When Time Slowed Down

Some time back, while I was having my dinner, I suddenly noticed something which people would normally call a nightmare (but you see, I am not those 'people', although I am not trying to imply anything about myself calling things abnormally or the abnormal way. OK, I think this may sound confusing. In short, while people would call it a nightmare, I would refer it as "one of the nightmare-of-nightmares").

Well, since I'm blogging about a time-related event, I might as well use time as a guide to better relate the situation (note that the time is merely a rough gauge. I certainly did not have the luxury - or rather, insanity, although engineering is sanity-consuming by nature - to time my actions with a stopwatch) :

Time = 0 s (Erm, I'm not trying to imply that something happened when time stood still. Rather, this is merely a reference frame with respect to the time the event started, which was around 830 p.m.)
[Glass Cookie (GC) was halfway to three-quarters through his dinner when he noticed something flying into the living room through the balcony.]

GC's brain: The eye department would like to convey that the currently-unidentified-but-not-for-long flying object (CUBNFL-F-O) is brown in colour.

GC's thoughts: Hey, something is not right. Something's ominous about this brown thing.

Time = 2 s
[At this point in time, GC has traced the path of the CUBNFL-F-O and determined that it has settled on the curtains in the living room]

GC's brain: The CUBNFL-F-O has been identified. The intelligence unit has the following report:

Identity: Cockroach
Callsigns: Roach, freakshows, xiao3 qiang2
Size: Large. Probably adult.
Physical appearance: A weird oval. It seemed like a fattened roach.
Threat: Highly dangerous. Proceed with caution.

GC's thoughts: ARRRGH (volume: 10 x 10^8 decibels)!!! NOT AGAIN...

Time = 3 s
GC's brain: The various muscle departments would like to convey that they are currently on high alert, and some of them are flexed.

GC's subconscious: Hey, could you feel that? Looks like the brain has released adrenaline! Hmmm, fight or flight? Fight or flight? Fight or flight?

GC's thoughts: I need to do something, I need to do something, I need to... etc. etc. (this repeats in a loop indefinitely)


Time = 5 s
GC's thoughts: I'd better cover my soup, since it's the only food item with the largest amount of volume as compared to the other dishes.

GC's subconscious (at this point of time, there is no idea whether the subconscious is up to good or no good): Hurry, hurry, hurry...

GC's thoughts: Hey, there is an empty plate! I guess I'll use that to cover my soup.

Time = 7 s
GC's thoughts: Hmmm, I need to do something. I guess the next best thing is to find a housefly swatter.

[GC leaves his seat and goes off to look for the housefly swatter]

GC's thoughts: Hmmm, where is the swatter? Is it beside the piano?

GC's brain: I'm sorry. Due to the adrenaline being released, the memory retrieval department is currently facing certain technical difficulties. Any inconvenience is deeply regretted.

GC's thoughts: ARRRGH!!! Where is the swatter? Where is the swatter? Hey, it would be great if my piano teacher is here. But that's not the case now. Arrrgh, stop thinking of nonsense and try to recall where the swatter is...

[GC walks around the hall and tries to locate the housefly swatter]

GC's subconscious: Hey, hey, hey... Consider this great idea. Since you are away from the roach now, are you sure you want to confront it? This is a good chance to just hide in your room man. I know you wanna do it...

GC's thoughts: Hmmm, that is not a good idea. I will never be at peace. A cookie's gotta do what a cookie's gotta do. And that is... (wavering, but still insistent) to kill the roach.

Time = 40 s
[The swatter has been found, and GC goes back to the dining area where the curtain is]

GC's brain: Red alert! The eye and intelligence department has the following report on the cockroach:

Current location: Unknown
Last sighted: The curtains
Current possible location: In one of the folds of the curtains.
Suggested next action: Shake the curtains to drive out the target.

GC's subconscious: Ooo, could you feel that? That funny feeling going down your spine.

GC's thoughts: Arrrgh, this is freaky. Guess I'll shake the curtains...

Time = 45 s
[GC gives a whack at the curtains and takes 2 steps back to observe]

GC's brain: There is currently no observation.

Time = 50 s
[GC gives a whack at the curtains and takes 2 steps back to observe again]

GC's brain: There is currently no observation.

Time = 55 s
GC's brain: The intelligence department suggests more to be done. The alternatives are as follows:

1) Remove the main fold of the curtain to draw it out, and take a leap back immediately
2) Keep on whacking at the curtain to draw it out, and frequently take a leap back for safety
3) Stretch out the entire curtain at full length to search for it
4) Do it the garang rambo style and shake the curtains with your bare hands to shake/freak/whatever-you-call-it the freakshow out.

GC's brain: Alert! The intelligence department would like to report that there has been a breach of security. The subconscious department has tampered with the above report and added options 3 and 4.

GC's thoughts: Arrgh!!! I have NO time for crappy options. Hmmm, I think it'll continue hiding and whacking would not draw it out. I'll have to go for option one I guess. Sigh... this sucks. Why did this thing have to enter my home and disturb my peace?

Time = 60 s
[GC proceeds cautiously to the corner of the curtain to release one main fold of the curtain which would reveal the location of the cockroach more clearly, and takes a huge leap backwards]

GC's brain: There is currently no observation.

Time = 62 s
GC's brain: There is currently no observation.

Time = 64 s
GC's brain: There is currently no observation.

Time = 66 s
GC's brain: Warning! The cockroach has been sighted on the curtains!

GC's thoughts: Oh, so there it is...

GC's subconscious: Fight or flight? Fight or flight? (this goes on at a rate of about 3 iterations per second)

Time = 70 s
[GC takes a strike at the cockroach, but misses, and takes a leap back]

GC's thoughts: Arrrgh, missed.

GC's brain: The target has been alerted and has moved to a new location on the curtains. The intellegence department reports that an assault is still possible.

GC's thoughts: OK, I've gotta give it a try again.

Time = 75 s
[GC takes a strike at the cockroach, but misses, and takes a leap back]

GC's thoughts: Arrrgh, I missed again... This is bad bad bad.

GC's brain: The intelligence department reports that the target has yet to move. It is still possible to strick once again.

GC's thoughts: OK, I gotta give it a try again. I musn't miss...

Time = 77.0 s (Notice the decimal point? Yup, this is the moment when time slowed down, if you're wondering what the title of this post actually referred to)
GC's brain: Red alert! The cockroach has taken flight. Its current heading is towards your direction.

GC's thoughts: WHATTTTTT???!!!

GC's brain: Emergency release of large dosages of adrenaline to system peripherals initiated...

Time = 77.1 s
GC's brain: The eye department will now zoom into the target at will. 2x magnification initiated.

GC's thoughts: Hey, I could actually observe the flapping of the roach. Hey, I could also see its feelers too! Man, this is gross and scary.

Time = 77.2 s
GC's brain: Alert! Target approaching from 12 o'clock, 1.1 meters, at chest level.

GC's thoughts: Hey, it's approaching me (ie. the realisation has finally [or suddenly, considering that it was a split second event] taken place, now that the motion of the cockroach could be observed)!!!

GC's subconscious (once again, the subconscious comes out to do stuff, and this time it is uncalled for): Fight or flight? Fight or flight?

Time = 77.3 s
GC's brain: Alert! Target approaching from 12 o'clock, 0.9 meters, at chest level.

GC's thoughts: Arrrgh, it's still approaching me, and it's not steering to the left or right? This is bad bad bad bad bad.

GC's subconscious (somehow, it seemed to take a neutral or pro-GC standpoint): OK, you can't really flee now. This is the time to attack...

GC's brain: Battle protocol and sequence initiated. The hand has been activated. Grip on the swatter has increased, and various muscle groups are now flexed.

Time = 77.4 s
GC's brain: Alert! Target approaching from 12 o'clock, 0.7 meters, at chest level.

GC's thoughts: OK, I think now is the time to strike...

GC's subconscious: Hmmm, you know what? In a very short period of time, it's either the end of the cockroach, or the end of you.

GC's thoughts (grimly): Yup, very soon, either the cockroach or I will perish. Hmmm, I don't think it could actually kill me right? Arrrgh, I have no time to think...

GC's subconscious: Wait for it... wait for it...

GC's thoughts (apparently influenced by the subconscious, and parroting it): Wait for it... wait for it... Hey, everything's slowing down! This is good for me...

Time = 77.50 s (Erm, although I can't explain this other than adrenaline being the cause, time slowed down even further)
GC's brain: Alert! Now is the time to strike. It's now or never.

GC's subconscious: Here goes!

Time = 77.53 s
[GC flexes his grip, aims for the cockroach and accelerates the swing on the arm that holds the swatter]

GC's brain: Alert! Target approaching at 12 o'clock, 0.5 meters, at chest level.

Time = 77.56 s
[The current swing position is at 45 degrees from the horizontal

GC's subconscious: Aim for it...

Time = 77.58 s
[The current swing position is close to 90 degrees from the horizontal

GC's thoughts: Hey, I could actually control my arm movement perfectly!!! This is cool... ... and scary. If I miss, this is the end...

Time = 77.60 s
[The attack is made, and GC recoils back as a preventive measure]

GC's brain: The nerves would like to convey that a deep impact could be felt from the hand. The target is hit. I repeat, the target is hit.

GC's thoughts: Yay! I got it! I got it!

Gc's subconscious: Are you sure you got it? What if you didn't?

GC's thoughts: Arrrgh!!! Is it hit?

GC's brain: The nerves definitely felt a DEEP impact. It is hit.

GC's subconscious: Hey, you're actually feeling very happy.

GC's thoughts: Yay! I got it! I got it!

Time = 77.60 s
GC's brain: Warning! The recoil taken is too great. You are losing balance. I repeat, you are losing balance!

GC's thoughts: Arrrgh, help... I don't want to hit the furniture!

[GC staggers managed to protect himself after hopping some 5 steps or more]
And so ends the freaky episode that took place. This was the mechanism of death of the cockroach:

1) Upon impact, the cockroach was crushed head first by the swatter.
2) The cockroach then accelerated towards the ground. The impact upon hitting the ground was great enough for it to lose a wing.
3) It then bounced off the ground due to the great impact and displaced about 1.5 meters away from GC.
4) When the cockroach was discovered, it was no longer moving at all (according to GC's dad, cockroaches are pretty resilient such that a few whacks may not even cause it to be motionless).

Conclusion: Never underestimate the power of adrenaline rushes (or was it a adrenaline flash flood in my case?), and... may all cockroaches end up like this (erm, I'm not refering to the situation like this one - it's freaky. Rather, may all roaches share the same fate as this intruder).

Conclusion 2:
Cockroach has been defeated. You gain 1 exp and 0 gold pieces.

Congratulations, you have gained a level.

+1 Courage
+1 Attack
+5 Dexterity
+0 Defense
+0 Strength
+0 Intelligence

Reflex booster learned.