Hmmm... Hmmm... HMMM...

In recent months, I've been thinking/pondering/frustrating/exasperated over one irritating, there's-no-answer-to-it-yet-but-I-cannot-avoid-thinking-about-it kind of question that's on my mind: What am I supposed to do in the future? And, because I've been thinking about it more often that not (hmmm... or perhaps I've been thinking too little about it previously, and now it's payback time... [gasp]) these recent months, I happened to notice/discover the following:

- When my friends talked about developments in the aer*space arena, engines, plane models and whatever-else-there-is, as hard as I tried (since it was the seemingly right thing to do anyway), I couldn't share their excitement or their interest. The only successful thing I managed to do was to appear interested and merely listen, and that's about it. Other than that, attempting to contribute anything would be a joke, or perhaps a walk down memory lane since all that I knew would probably be relatively ancient or merely common knowledge.

- I had countless people (ok, maybe they weren't that countless after all since I'm pretty sure I could count from 1 to 1000 without a problem, and it's quite sad if I had problems doing a simple thing as counting. Rather, I've lost count of the number of people ever since I entered aer*space engineering) asking me why I wasn't doing computer engineering, and predicting that I would do pretty well in that (of which I beg to differ, considering how my roomie is mugging like crap in computer engineering currently. And just in case you didn't know, I 'abandoned' him for aer*space). Well, I've got no idea.

- Barely a few months ago, a piano dip seemed to be a joke told to me by my dear piano teacher. And when someone asked me this particular question just last sunday (I can't remember the exact phrasing), I was surprised at my own answer: "You mean you actually prefer mugging tau geis to aer*space???!!!". And as you've guessed (well, if you bothered, that is. Come to think about it, using this phrase would require the condition that I guessed correctly that you guessed correctly. Hmmm... Nah, let's not go into some guessing game that leads to probably nowhere and return to the topic lest I stray further away from it), my answer was a 'Yes'. The scary part was that, I didn't have much of a doubt with that answer. Ahhh... never underestimate the exasperating powers of aer*space engineering.

- Sadly, up till now, I cannot answer the not-as-countless-as-the-computer-engineering-question-but-countless-enough-nonetheless question as to why I entered aer*space engineering. Perhaps it was for the crappy prestige at the sound of it? Perhaps it was the promised bright future and supposedly large pay that accompanied it (which felt more like a fantasy as the days passed on in aer*space. In my opinion, it's the managers that get the large pays. Engineers do the very thing that most [if not, 'all'] engineers are for: to make things work for the managers)? Perhaps it was my parents' suggestion? (Hmmm... I've got a big feeling from memory that... never mind...). Should I be asked this question again, it would be the same answer as usual, as always, and will always be: "I have no idea".

Well, although I do not have the answers to some of the above questions, there's one question I could answer though =)

Question: How do you find aer*space engineering?

Answer: I dare say, with a burning (actually, burning would be an understatement. More accurately, it's more like a nuclear fusion/fission) passion, that... ihateengineeringihateengineeringihateengineeringihateengineering
ihateengineeringihateengineeringihateengineeringihateengineering
ihateengineeringihateengineeringihateengineeringihateengineering
x [(x infinity ^ infinity ^ infinity... the list goes on for infinity) ^
(x infinity ^ infinity ^ infinity...) ^ (...) ^ (...)] ^ [...] ^ [...]... the powers go on for infinity.

Thought: Arrrgh, I must stop thinking about it. =\ But I can't... but I must... but... but...